Fall in New England simply cannot be beat. The brilliance of the trees, the crisp smell in the air, the leaves that crunch under your feet, and the farm-stand bounty at every turn make this my favorite time of year.  Each fall we make the traditional trips to the apple orchard, and then the pumpkin patch, overloading ourselves with produce, emptying our wallets of cash. Completely worth it, when you think of supporting local business and creating happy family memories all in one fell swoop. 

This spring I decided to try my thumb at growing pumpkins, as the vegetable garden of last spring did not turn out as successful as I had hoped.  I have proudly harvested a total of three pumpkins. One fits snugly in the palm of my preschooler’s hand and one is a lopsided rectangle, so I’m beginning to think that growing things is not so much my talent. While out visiting the one decent size pumpkin yesterday, my eye wandered over to the forlorn apple tree in our side yard.  Where we live it is a constant battle to keep the wilds of nature at bay, and this tree was tucked into some overgrown weeds and had never really been given much thought since we moved in three years ago.  Upon inspection I found that although ugly, the apples appeared to be…well….apples, I guess.  Being brave, I mean really, who picks things to eat off trees that have gone un-noticed for years, I scrubbed it off on my jeans and took a tentative bite. Yup. Definitely an apple. An edible apple.  I called Miss Four-Year-Old over and said “start picking”. “Mommy, these apples are NOT beautiful like the apple picking apples.” I assured her, and then myself, that they’d work just fine for applesauce. 

So, inside we went with our half-full canvas bag of ugly apples, where we chopped and boiled and had a lovely conversation about how it’s hard to tell what an apple will look like on the inside from the way it looks on the outside, and how people can be kind of like that too. We talked about how the boiling apples made the kitchen smell good, and how this boiling water made the apples change from hard crunchy things to soft, mushy things.  When I pulled out the antique food mill, she asked me to show her how to turn it on, and was stunned to hear that there was no ‘on’ switch.  “Back in the ‘old’ days”, I found myself explaining, “people had to use their bodies for power. “ She is still working on understanding this concept of pre-electricity. It horrifies her a bit.  She took her turn at working the food mill, but decided that watching was more fun. When the apples were all sauced and she was eating a dish of warm applesauce, she looked at me with shiny eyes and declared me to be awesome. There is nothing more fabulous in the world to hear, than these words coming from the mouth of a sticky preschooler.  Today that applesauce was turned into cake.  And I think we can all agree, that as delicious as fresh applesauce may be, fresh applesauce cake is even tastier.

The whole process made me think about awareness. The process of harvesting the apples,  preparing them  for saucing, and then getting to finally eat the product was an exercise in awareness for my daughter.  That’s the great thing about being small is that you are able to devote all of your senses to learning so easily. As adults, our heads are always working on five or six things at a time, and stopping to smell the roses, or in this case, taste the apples, seems a luxury. For three years, although I knew we had an apple tree (actually we have three), I was never really aware that it produced apples. Sure, I admire the pink and white blooms in the spring, and I drive over the fallen apples with the lawn mower, but to be aware of them enough to make use of them? Nope, not at all. This made me wonder what else might be hiding out there in my yard waiting to be discovered.  After I finish my piece of warm cake, I just might go take a look.

Summer is in full swing. Full of sunny days, trips to the beach, popsicles, and burgers on the grill. We are a little past the half way point, and though the back to school sales are everywhere, we aren't quite done with fun yet. In our house things are settling down a little from trips to visit family in Vermont and soccer camp. August in the best month of summer in my book. We’ve made it through the scheduled things and now for four, blissful weeks are pretty much left to out own devices. This is where we start to get a bit crafty with our time. We’ve had this hula- hoop project we’ve wanted to try for a long time and what better time than right now. My 4 year-old insists the proper name is a “hoopa-loop”, not a hula-hoop. You can call it what you like. Giving credit where credit is due, we got this project from Ms. Aime at Stillwater School.

We are a soccer family. Sometime in the last few years some sort of shift happened and I realized that I was driving a mini-van with a foldable chair and Tupperware dish of orange slices in the back. Suddenly I was SOCCER MOM. Didn’t really see it coming, although I have friends who will disagree with that statement. They apparently saw it coming years ago. Part of our soccer-mindedness comes from Coach Dad. Before we had our own kids my husband coached soccer, basketball and baseball (this was probably a clue to those friends of mine, now that I think about it). Anyway, it was only natural that he coached our daughter when she was old enough. Most of the time it works pretty well for our family.

Sometimes though I run into some trouble meshing Soccer Mom with Yoga Teacher. Soccer Mom tries to stay out of the team’s business, leaving the coaching to the coaches, but Yoga Teacher Me cringes each and every time I see a coach (Coach Dad included) fail to warm up their players before practices and games. It is so important for muscles, especially developing muscles to ease in. Warming up prevents injury, plain and simple. Warming up the muscles creates blood flow which prepares the muscles for the exercise to come. This works to prevent strain. Coach Dad can tell you that he recently learned this lesson the hard way. Warming up also cues the brain to get in the games. Our bodies build muscle memory fairly quickly. If we practice the same sort of warm up each time we prepare for aerobic activity we are cueing the brain as well as our bodies, of what’s coming. This is particularly helpful with kids. Kids thrive on ritual. It is really important for them to have a predictable series of events. Warm ups serve as a transition between on and off the field. Warm ups cue the brain that its time for sports now, creating a more focused athlete.

Most coaches in our area are not paid for their time. They do go through a basic training of sorts, but it simply can’t cover everything. The ones who do warm up their teams, may know why they are doing it but not always the best way to go about it (no offense to the fabulous coaches out there who know exactly what they are doing all of the time). Here is where the yoga comes in, I know you were waiting for it. Yoga can target the specific areas of the body that are most prone to injury or overuse on the field or court. Sports can create an imbalance by over-strengthening one area of the body. Yoga can help to equalize the unbalanced areas. Yoga builds flexibility giving the muscles a better range of motion which again, prevents strain on the body. Yoga is an opportunity for athletes to build muscle memory to complement their chosen sport, outside of the competition that comes with it. In addition, the meditative qualities of a regular yoga practice, along with breathing techniques can work to focus an athlete and lessen any pre-game jitters. Pro-athletes are adding yoga to their training because yoga enhances their game.

The fall athletic season is fast approaching. Most teams will start practices within a few short weeks. If your child is playing a sport this fall, talk with the coach about warming up at every practice and before every game. And then thank them for volunteering their time. If you, or your coaches, are looking for ideas on the best way to incorporate warming up(and cooling down) into the program give a shout out. We’d love to help. Yoga is for everyone, after all, athletes included. If you’d like you child to learn more about the right way to warm up for his or her sport consider registering for our Sports Stretch Clinic on August 6th.

If not, maybe I’ll see you on the soccer field this fall. I’ll be the lady in the yoga pants passing out oranges.

As far as kids go, I can’t really complain too much about mine (see them here looking so very sweet). They eat veggies, most of the time. They go to bed without a fuss, usually. They share, except with each other. And they give really good hugs. There are those times though…...those times when they show their other sides that I sometimes hit a wall as a mom. We’ve all been there. That moment when you simply do not know how to respond to what they throw at you.

We see these parents whose kids talk back, won’t stay in their beds, refuse to eat any thing that isn’t white, interrupt constantly, run in the other direction when they hear their name called, scream loudly in inappropriate places, snatch toys from their playmates, hit and kick their parents, and pick prize boogers out of their noses to pop into their precious little mouths. Often times we watch in silent horror, while in our minds, we judge their parenting. ‘Well‘, we think, ‘if only she had some control over that child‘. ‘If only, they disciplined her better‘. ‘If only, they stopped caving in to his tantrums’. These parents feel our eyes on them. They feel our silent horror. They know we are judging them. And they are powerless to stop it, because, as you know if you have kids, we have all been there at some point. We have all given in to our children at some point, just to get them to stop. Stop, already, you win.

We’ve all felt the eyes on us when it’s OUR child acting up in a way we don’t like. Sometimes it isn’t even that our kids are misbehaving it’s that they aren't behaving in the way we want them to. They won’t say hello to the co-worker we bump into at a restaurant. They won’t play with the other kids at the playground when we have only brought them there to get a much needed respite from their endless chatter. They won’t participate in a class that we thought they would love when we signed them up, and paid an outrageous fee to attend.

Parents sometimes conveniently forget that all kids have issues. We can parent them to the moon and back but when it comes right down to it no child can be forced to be the person our expectations want them to be. It’s easy to make ourselves feel better by judging the other parents who are struggling with the same issues we face. We tell ourselves, our spouses, our friends, how we would do it differently. It takes a bit more effort to support each other. Take turns switching kids with a friend so you each get a break. Engage the mom at the playground, who is clearly one step away from losing her mind (you know her because you have been her), in a conversation. Before becoming a mom I would never engage strangers in conversation. After a few years at home watching ‘Little Bear’ I would talk to anyone who would listen. Ask for help when you need it. There is no shame in admitting you are stumped. Sometimes all it takes is a fresh set of eyes and ears to work something out. We parents are a team and we need to work together. Team Parent! Who’s with me?!

It has been my long-standing belief that our children will tell us what they need from us. All we need to do is to know how to listen and decide how to respond. We don’t always have the answer. A good parent doesn’t have all the answers to all the problems they will face while raising a child. Instead, a good parent makes the time to find and try solutions until they hit on the one that works.If we start a new job we usually have some sort of training before we begin. Parenting doesn't work that way.  The training isn't handed to you. It doesn't always come naturally. Sometimes you need to seek it out.  I’ve heard friends say they don’t believe in parenting books. I agree to a point. A parenting book isn’t designed to give you concrete answers about your child. Not all ideas work with all kids, or all families for that matter. What a good parenting book can do is give you a set of guidelines to go by so that you can then make educated decisions about the dilemmas you will face as a parent. One of my favorite parenting authors is Louise Bates Ames, Ph.D. Her series of books begins with Your One Year Old: Fun Loving and Fussy, and continues on up to Your Ten-Fourteen Year Old. In each of these short books there are guidelines about development. What to expect from certain ages, and suggestions about appropriate discipline. Also in each book is a healthy dose of realism. A parenting attitude adjustment, if you will. Sometimes it isn't the child's behavior we need to change, it's our own.

My family and friends have children of various ages from those still in the womb to teens. I don’t know their children as well as they do. I do know that what works for my family can’t possibly work for all of theirs, because all these little people are so very different. My kids are not perfect, nor do I want them to be. We take one day at a time and do what we can.

Do you have an issue that your family is struggling with that you could use a suggestion for? Do you have a tip to share? Post it here and become part of our parenting team.



　

　

　

Making time to practice yoga every day doesn’t work for all of us. Sometime finding more than five minutes of uninterrupted time can be an impossible task. Especially if your house is inhabited by the under 10 crowd as mine is. So we need to get creative. We need to sneak in the yoga. One way to do this is by moving with intention. By paying attention to what goes on below our necks. Most of us spend a great deal of our day in our brains. One of the reasons our bodies crave yoga is because it takes our awareness away from the thoughts that race through our heads and down into our bodies. You don’t need an hour long class every day to get to that place. Here are a few ways that I get sneaky about incorporating my yoga practice into my day:

3 Minute Meditation - Fill a laundry basket and tell your people that you are going to your room to fold laundry and, if they follow you, they have to help. Ok, so maybe it isn’t 100% truthful, but it is in the best interest of everyone in your household. Once safely in your room, close the door, sit on the floor, close your eyes, and tell yourself that you are breathing in and breathing out. All it takes is a few minutes of this to feel like a whole new person. I find this to be a particularly helpful tool when my brain is overwhelmed and gearing up for an anxiety attack.

Check in with your feet - Each time you find yourself standing in one place for any extended period of time (like washing dishes) , check in with your feet. For most of us our toes point out to the sides when we aren‘t paying attention. Turn them so they face forward. This small change will travel up your legs and knees and into your hips. Now, take it a step further, if you’d like, and think Mountain Pose with those legs. Use your core muscles too and washing the dishes is a whole new event.

And speaking of feet...use your whole foot - Each time you are getting up from a seated position or climbing stairs place your whole foot on the floor or step. No more running on the stairs on tip toes. This will again engage more muscles in your legs and bottom. When these muscles are working you are also taking some of the stress off your knees. Think of all the work your legs can get while you run upstairs to tuck your child back into bed seventeen times.

Sit on the floor - Skip chairs whenever you can. Sitting on the floor requires your hips to stretch, creating flexibility. The more opportunities you give your hips to stretch, the happier they become. Happy hips, happy body.

Picking things up - How many times a day do you bend over to pick things up? Every time you bend over think about putting some yoga into action. Fold over into a forward bend with intention instead of just reaching and grabbing. Pull in those core muscles and try it with your legs together (Uttanasana), legs apart (Prasarita Padottanasana), one leg up in a standing split, over to the side on one leg (Ardha Chandrasana - Half moon), you get the idea.

Find a little balance - Any time you find yourself standing in one place for any period of time, take a leg up off the floor and find your tree pose. Maybe it won’t build your focus the same way it will in a yoga class, but it will work your feet and strengthen your ankles. Remember to do both sides.

Use your tummy wisely - Engage your core muscles often. These muscles support your spine. By toning your core you are helping to prevent back injuries, as well as allowing your spine to elongate itself. This creates more space on the sides of your body, which in turn creates a slimmer appearance. So, sitting at your desk, driving in your car, taking a walk, wherever, pull in your core. It’s like a stomach crunch without all the fuss. Think about your core muscles wrapping around from the sides of your body to the center and then draw them up towards your rib cage. In and up, baby, in and up.

Butterflies in Bed - Baddhakonasana, Butterfly pose, is super easy to sink into while lying in bed or watching TV. Lie down in bed, or prop your back up on some pillows on the floor, bring your feet together and draw them in towards your groin. Use blankets or pillows under your knees for a little extra support if you’d like. Ahhh…..yummy.

Be thankful - Show gratitude for all that you have. We all have things we want, but sometimes its hard to remember to be grateful for what we already have. When we can begin to appreciate all that we do have our perspective begins to shift. We begin to see that often times we have what we need, and all the rest is just gravy.

A few nights ago, while  plugged into the tv, an ad came on for yet another prescription drug. Normally we have a good chuckle at these ads at my house. Need longer eyelashes? Buy our new amazing drug! You might go blind but you will be beautiful! Cholesterol too high? Forget about diet and exercise, pop one of these instead! Then there are the ones that list death as a possible side effect. Really, death? Can something as permanent as death be considered a side effect? Anyway, the ad that came on the other night crossed a line for me. Its one thing to market adult medications with horrendous side effects, but when it turns to kids I get a bit riled up. ADHD gets me going every time.

I am no stranger to ADHD. I live with an ADHD spouse and it can be quite frustrating. I’ve worked in preschools and public schools and I’ve seen the struggles that children, their parents and their teachers face in trying to create an environment that works for both the diagnosed child and his or her classmates. I’ve seen kids so medicated that they can barely stay awake in their seats and are devoid of the emotions that make them, well, them.  I won’t get into (at this moment anyway) the fact that I firmly believe we are over-diagnosing this disorder. But drugging a child every day to get through school, or keep the peace at home, raises some red flags to me. Particularly when the side effects can be more debilitating than the original problem.

Sleepiness, tiredness, insomnia (which is it, you can or can’t sleep on this?), nausea, stomach pain, low heart rate, fainting. Your child should not operate heavy machinery. Your child should avoid dehydration. Your child may become a zombie.

We can’t be in our children’s bodies to know how the drug we give them makes them feel. I argue that it is one thing to medicate ourselves, experience the side effect and know whether or not it is worth it for us to continue, but it is an entirely different matter to feed our kids a pill and hope they don’t faint. Hope they don’t fall asleep on their desk. Hope they don’t spend their day with stomach pains and nausea.

There are other ways to manage the issues created by ADHD. The first is to recognize that some kids are simply high energy. It comes with being a kid. These are the kiddos who absolutely must play outside for hours each day no matter the weather. The ones who need to play sports and who need skillful teachers who understand that they not all kids are perfect. There is proof that changing a child’s diet can remedy the hyperactivity. Eliminating gluten, processed foods, dyes, and SUGAR can eliminate the symptoms. Have you looked at what is on school menus for breakfast lately? Cinnamon buns, chocolate milk, pop-tarts in some schools. If we feed our children a breakfast of sugar whose fault is it when they can’t sit still and pay attention in class? Other types of non-drug intervention include bio-feedback, sensory integration techniques, positive behavior interventions (think reward systems vs. punishments), family education, meditation, acupuncture, and counseling. Oh yeah, and yoga, of course. There are also several herbal supplements that can reduce symptoms. However, just because it’s herbal doesn’t mean its safe. Do research, before giving your child anything you don’t know about. And then, when we exhaust all of these options, and nothing works? Then we an think about turning to pharmaceuticals, knowing we have done everything in our power for our child.

Parenting isn’t about taking the quick fix. Parenting is hard work. We have chosen to bring these little beings into the world, knowing full well sending them back where they came from is not an option. We owe it to them to try our very hardest to keep their bodies pure for as long as we can. Heaven knows they won’t stay that way forever. My theory on parenting has always come down to this: kids tell us what they need from us, and it is our job to be listening. Sometimes it can be hard to figure out what they are saying with their behavior, but all that means is we need to work harder at trying to understand. That’s what behavior is for - communication. It isn’t simply to push our buttons and turn our hair gray. It won’t always be easy, but we were never guaranteed that it would be. We can’t always do it on our own, sometimes we have to ask for help and that’s okay. No one should be judged for needing help. There are professionals for this. Find one if you need one. Don’t let your child be a walking list of side effects.

Maybe you got the email already or saw the Facebook post, but if you didn't, let me fill you in.  The Spring Equinox is fast approaching. You know that day when, even if the ground is still blanketed in snow, we New Englanders begin to see the end of this frozen world in sight. The eve of spring.  The official date I'm referring to is March 20th.  This year we've had a particularly long and cold winter in Maine, so when a friend, and fellow teacher, suggested this idea I jumped on board.  108 Sun Salutations to welcome spring. 

So far when I have brought this up to my students (the adults) and friends and family I have been greeted with faces of disbelief and abject horror. "Why on earth would you do that?", they ask me. "Why 108?"

Well, in ancient yogi times 108 was considered to be the number of wholeness of existence. It is the average distance of the sun and the moon to earth (multiplication is involved here and I am no math whiz, so I'm going to trust the info given to me on this one). 108 is also the number of 'Upanishads' (ancient Indian texts). 108 is the number of beads on a mala (and a catholic rosary) so essentially, if a person completes 108 Sun Salutations that person becomes the mala.

Now that you have the reason for the number let me tell you why you should come and give a go with me.

1. I have never done this before so I am a beginner in this respect.  My sources tell me that training for this is not necessary. It isn't like running a 5K. I am putting a lot of trust into those sources. I'm letting go of any fear that I can't do this. I know I can, and I know you can too. 
2. We are breaking those 108 Sun Salutes into 4 sets of 27 with a break between each set to drink water, rest and use the facilities.
3. Yogis around the world are doing this on the same day, how cool is that! My husband referred to it as The Great Guinness Toast of the yoga world. Even cooler.
4. What else are you going to do to welcome spring? Clean your house? This is a great excuse to procrastinate cleaning. This is spring cleaning of the body, mind and soul.
5. Impress your friends and family. Ok, granted that is not a very yogic reason but I couldn't resist.  :)
6. Practicing Sun Salutations is very meditative.  We connect each pose in the vinyasa to our breath. Meditation has been proven very effective in reducing stress. If you are not someone who can sit still to meditate this might just be the ticket for you.
7. Think of the physical workout involved. What a great way to kickstart a healthy spring.
8. Completing this as part of a group has its benefits. A sense of community.  We will do the counting so you won't lose your place, we will support each other when it starts to feel like it will not end, and we will all celebrate together when we finish.
9. It is a valid reason to escape your kids for an afternoon.
10. It is a challenge. Challenging yourself is an important way to grow as an individual. The sense of accomplishment after a real challenge is a blissful thing.
So, come salute the sun and welcome in spring with us. Be part of the global mala on March 20th. For details, give a call or email. Now, who's with me?

A friend texted me the other day that her 15 month old could do down dog upon request. It made me smile because there aren’t many things that 15 month olds will do when you ask them. This little guy has two older sisters who have been in yoga classes since September and a mom who comes to class every week so he is certainly exposed to yoga. It started me thinking though, of how kids are naturally drawn to yoga, with or without formal instruction.

As a child, if you checked on me while I was sleeping, you would often find me on my back with my legs in baddhakonasana (butterfly pose). It just felt right to me. My yoga teacher recalls sitting in poses before she ever even heard the word yoga. Kids listen to their bodies in a way that we seem to forget how to do as adults. Kids move because it feels good, not because they are trying to get the recommended 30 minutes of exercise each day. They don’t care about the health benefits of yoga as long as they are having fun. Kids don’t care if they are in yoga clothes or on a mat, they’ll do yoga anywhere. Deep into a game of Candy-land, during one of our many snow days last week, my own three year old spent the time waiting for her next turn in the one-legged variation of down dog. I marveled at her ability pop back and forth between unintentional yoga and moving her red plastic gingerbread man down the rainbow path to the Kandy Kastle (their spelling not mine).

Winter in New England is tricky with little people. We can’t get outside as much as we need to. Schools are closed with no notice due to weather we can’t control. The sun seems to disappear for weeks at a time. Cabin fever begins to set in and once it does all bets are off. Most of us fight it, at least for awhile. We complain, we overeat, we exercise less. Our bodies crave hibernation. More than once I have wished I was a bear who could fall asleep around Thanksgiving and wake up in April. Even if you enjoy winter sports and activities there comes that moment when you have had enough. Kids don’t seem to fight it as adults do. Kids surrender to the joys of winter and all that it entails. They are blissfully unaware of the scheduling nightmares snow days create. They are happy to use their ‘outside voices’ inside. They make fun and find movement wherever they are, because that’s what kids do. This makes winter is the perfect time to bring yoga into your family. Kids crave movement. Movement is good. It’s too easy to curl up with a book on a chilly day.

If you are feeling the need to move, or even if you aren’t, but you know you need to, here are a few tricks to have up your sleeve as we watch January crawl slowly into February:

Musical mats: Just like musical chairs but with yoga mats and pose cards. When the music stops you hop on the mat closest to you and come into the pose on the card. (a Child Light Yoga game)

Toss-Across yoga style: Remember Toss-Across, the tic-tac-toe game played with bean bags? Using index cards draw poses on the cards and tape over the X’s and O’s. Chuck a bean bag at it and have everyone come into the pose that gets flipped. Three in a row and everybody wins. You could do the same game without the Toss-Across board, by mixing up the cards and placing them face down.

Down Dog Tunnels: This is a favorite with preschoolers. Take turns coming into down dog and the other person rolls a ball under you. Seem kind of boring? Not if you’re three. If you are three, it’s a hoot!

Yoga Flow Collages: Cut up all those old issues of Yoga Journal and put them to work. For younger kids the simple act of cutting and gluing is all that’s needed. For school-agers, challenge them to create a flow of poses with the pictures they cut out, and then try it together.

When all else fails and you simply need to get out of the house, come to a yoga class. Give the kids up to someone else for a little while where they can be loud and silly, put their feet on the walls and stand on their heads. Let a certified professional give you a break for an hour so you can re-group and breathe. And, in the off chance there isn’t a kid’s yoga class near you, there is an adult one. Yoga studios are EVERYWHERE. Find one that works for you and take your own class. Maybe it doesn’t solve the problem of entertaining the children, but after an hour or so of being in your own body, you’ll be recharged and ready to go. Movement is good. Just ask a toddler.